Erika and the Post-observation Awkwardness of the Split Orange

The events described here happened in the future. This is Erika, likely not her name as we not yet have met, nevertheless, I think of them as Erika. I saw her in the Fresh'n'Cheap at Makelweiss and Rouge while buying ingredients for my Thursday Mulligatawny, ... she was hard not to notice, so I noticed: very tall, very slim, with sunken cheeks and a straight thin nose that would've served her well in the silent-movie era. She wore a hoody under jeans-jacket and thick grey wool leggings with black sneakers (here is a sketch from memory): 

As I gather up my Celery and Apples, Erika is in front of me at the check-out putting three sweet potatoes and three oranges on the belt. When the belt moved, the oranges rolled a little and I saw that one had a gash running meridionally showing the pale-yellow flesh inside. "Excuse me," said I ... no reaction ... "Excuse me" a little louder. Erika turned but looked somehow above and through me. I pointed: "One Orange is cracked". "That's alright" she turned to the cashier and said "Debit", grabbed her stuff, and was gone. I froze into a statue of utter embarrassment and asked the cashier "Did you see that?" she said: "She's a weirdo". As this hasn't yet happened but it certainly may, I made a policy decision not to point out flaws in other people's citric (or any other) fruit in the future (or ever). 

Reenah Pap and the Sad and Slow Progresion of Sweet Regression

Reenah Pap is a consulting analytical statistician with degrees from MIT and LSE who worked with Schmerzfeld in Basel and with Van Himst in Antwerp. We met for coffee and she told me her story. Corporations and political organizations hire her to produce statistics that prove the views and opinions they currently promote/advocate/support. In her downtime, she designs and produces dazzling head ornaments (below is "Glitter and Gold", her best seller). She is a ruthless mercenary who will deliver quotable stats shamelessly skewed toward the needs and views of her employer. Reenah uses her website https://reenahpapstats.blogspot.com/ to publish her own objective, impartial, well-researched, and stunning stats. She had years of great professional and financial success as her skills in "developing statistics" were in great demand, but Reenah now yearns to retire. She thinks of a hilltop at Altopascio (about halfway between Pistoia and Lucca) where 74.16% of people are kind and will bring her bread and wine, another 28.22% will also bring olives and 17.55% will also bring cheese.

Reenah currently lives in St.Catherines, Ontario with a white dog called Lester and a black cat called Chester (28.95% of cats are black, 6.14% of dogs are white).