Pia and Andrea

These are Olimpia (Pia) and Andrea as I met them the other day on the steps of the ancient church of Santo Spirito in Florence. They sat there for half an hour, at least, making out energetically, enthusiastically but with sweet tenderness (nevertheless). Little did they know what the day will bring ... but I will tell you what will happen: after a while, they will get up and stroll down via Sant'Agostino towards San Frediano, on the way Andrea will buy a  light-orange, low-cut (front and back) dress for Pia from one of those open stands (because it will cling to her slender hips) and then they will go to Trattoria I'raddi on via D'Ardiglione. They will have a great dinner: they will share the antipasti misti and then Pia, before the primi arrive, will go to the washroom with the plastic bag and will change into her new dress. When she will return to their table, the dining room will hush in awe ... it will look like the dress moves by itself with a naked Pia inside; but in a minute, diners will turn back to their plates, as food cures envy (for ladies) and lust (for men). Pia will have Penne all' arrabbiata and  Andrea will have the Pan-seared gnocchi with Sage. Her main course will be Branzino with Basil, Lime, and Ginger and his, Bistecca Fiorentina (quite rare). They will have three glasses of wine each (Pia - white, Andrea - red) and will share a zucotto and have caffè with Limoncello (she) and with Grappa (he). They will leave the restaurant for the bar down the street for a bottle of Prosecco and live music and then to the bar around the corner, near Ponte Alla Carraia, for scotch (con ghiaccio).  In a while, they will turn to the bridge, she will say something and he will say something and she will slap him and will throw the plastic bag at him and turn and run across the Lungoarno, directly into the path of a taxi traveling at a great rate of speed. There will be a horrible breaking noise and screech of tires but, luckily no BUMP! The taxi will slow down and seeing no harm done, will go on. Andrea will run to Pia sitting on the pavement and hug her (she will hug him back) and kiss her (she will kiss him back) and they will sit there for half an hour, at least, making out energetically, enthusiastically but with sweet tenderness (nevertheless).

Linda Gervais

This is Linda Gervais (19), from Hoheburg, Amberg-Sulzbach in Bavaria, as she was busking (without a license) in Piazza di Santo Stefano, just off Ponte Vecchio, in Florence, the other day. Some of her friends call her "Linda Gaprindashwilli", she is 5'8" (170 cm), weighs exactly 100 pounds (45 kg), makes everything she plays on her guitar sound like bosa nova, wants bigger breasts and until a year ago won every chess tournament she ever entered: school-district, county, Land, and the German Women's National title. We talked about music and art, she likes Mario Sironi and when I said he is an idiot who cannot make up his mind if he wants to be de Chirico or Morandi, Linda threw her beer at me. We started to laugh, kissed and made up and decided to tell each other three things we never told anybody else. Linda told me that (1) I don't have to be beautiful to turn her on, (2) I don't have to be rich to be her girl and (3) there ain't no particular sign I have to be more compatible with. I put this all through the smoke rings of my mind and said to her that (1) her breasts are just fine, (2) eat more carbs, girl and one more thing that I now forgot. We talked until two. And then she said, "It's time for bed".

Jimmie-Joe Johnson

This is Jimmie-Joe Johnson taking a break between takes in the fantastic acoustics of the ancient church of Ognissanti in Florence ... he plays (what else, with such a name?) the trombone. The piece the Indiana State University Brass is recording is "Fanfare pour précéder 'La Péri'" by Paul Dukas and the trombone part was added by a very talented arranger (aunt of J.J.'s especially for J.J.). Florence is the second stop on the European tour (Budapest was the first) and J.J. enjoys it immensely, the first question they always ask is "where you from" J.J. answers proudly "U.S.A.", the second question has to do with Herr Donald the Strumpf and J.J. is embarrassed. Lucky the subject changes quickly to music and musicians for both of which the locals have huge respect ... like the other night, after the session when they went out with local friends, Italian fashion from one bar to another and then another and then another and J.J. woke up in somebody's apartment, in the Santa Croce area, half undressed and with his horne hanging safe and sound from the chandelier. He had a gallon of water directly from the tap in the kitchen and then went into a fortissimo rendition of his favorite: 'Moonglow' trombone solo by his bro Andy Derrick ... 

It was a blast with the neighbors!

Olga Meunière

This is Olga Meunière from Ostende, Western Flanders, Belgium as I met her munching a sandwich on Corso del Orso in Florence, the other day. She is the sweetest kid you ever want to meet, great sense of humor and a bright sunny disposition. Olga has three passions: travel and food and food. She lived in many places in Europe and cooked and eat her way through lots of diverse cuisines,  a regular Anthony Bourdain female clone if you wish (of whom Olga is the greatest fan). She is a great eater ... and I mean great, persistent, continuous and passionate ... rarely you see her without food in her hand or close by. Once, she went to the Universita di Pavia, Medical Centre to take part in a study of who eats and does not get fat ... the doctors were puzzled and could not explain the quantity of food she would eat without gaining one gram. The best time of her life was when she lived in Paris and met Vincent, a tall, dark, handsome American who lived on a diet of milkshakes and cheeseburgers (which he insisted to call "Royale with Cheese"). He became her boyfriend and they were very happy until, one day, Vincent got a phone call from California, packed up and left the next day. Olga never heard from him again and never had another burger (cheese or not) ever.  

Xenia Yakovleva Zaharova

This is Xenia Yakovleva Zaharova as I met her recently in the GAM in Milan and there are two reasons this is the only picture she agreed to - first: she believes her nose is too big for her face (it is not); the second reason will reveal itself as you read on. Xenia is an anthropologist and one of the world's foremost researchers of all things cultural, she lives in Nürenberg with her two cats and her brother Serghey. She is highly intelligent, devastatingly quick and utterly thorough: she will find all facts and present them totally unbiased. Now: Milan and Viena have a rivalry going back many years which resulted (sometimes) in statues of Generals in public squares and cemeteries filled with dead young men and, at other times, just heated verbal claims and disputes. Many of these have been settled: best Operahouse (Milan), best Symphonic Orchestra (Viena), best coffee (Milan), best pastry shops (Viena) but one item is still debated: where was it first that they deep fried breaded slices of veal called Wienerschnitzel (Viena) and Cotoletta Alla Milanese (Milan)? This is what Xenia was determined to determine (she is a vegetarian, so her interest in the subject was purely academic), it took about a year and a half and trips to Viena, Milan, Paris, and Budapest (where she found the final clue in a letter, dated August 21st, 1832, from Grof Janos to his cousin about a dinner with his friend Karl-Heinz von Gumpelholtz). Xenia's monograph was recently published by "Flyehans et Fils" in Geneva, in a beautifully illustrated bilingual edition and now she, as they say, "can not have lunch" in Milan anymore. 

Ayako Watanabe

This is Ayako Watanabe (38) of Ōtsu, Shiga Prefecture, Japan as I met her at the "Velvet Lounge Bar" on Via Stelvio, in Monza (almost a suburb of Milan). She was very happy and so totally proud for she was celebrating her second cover on the Japan Yogini Journal, the only person under forty to have had two covers. Ayako ordered a "Tequila e Red Bull" with a twist of line and a twig of Rosemary and I got myself a dram of Gray Goose. We talked about Yoga and life ... by the time I had four (Gray Goose) she'd had six ("Tequila e Red Bull") and had to excuse herself as being "Oh, so tired, oh so suddenly". The next picture is at breakfast the next morning ... Ayako had a terrible headache but she also had the absolute cure for it: her own Asana of her own invention: sitting in full Lotus, right-hand massage top of head pressure point (Bai Hui), left-hand in Karana Mudra. Her, it helped ... me, not so much! 

Lila Ma Uvelian

This is Lila (Ma) Uvelian in her pop-up store on Isola Madre, on Lago Maggiore ... she called it Lavanda Del Lago (wouldn't put it past clever Lila, to have made a play on "Lady of the Lake").  It is a souvenir store with a theme ... Lavender-Violet ... color-wise. It smells violet, it looks violet and it tastes violet too. Lila is an exceptionally pleasant young girl with a sweet voice, sunny disposition and great people skills. She runs the store more to meet people and talk, to exchange ideas and impressions about life and the universe rather than for commercial profit ... she does alright though. For a while, I couldn't figure why she stayed so deep in her, relatively dark, store until she stepped out into the light and I saw (more ... felt) the color of her hair. My head started spinnig, my throat choked and I floated into the air upside down seeing things down-side-up snapping mouthfuls of air as if most deliciously high ... couldn't decide if this was pleasant or not but I knew two things: it was dizzily nauseating and I did not want it to stop. After a while, I came to and went to take the boat to Stresa, but kept craning my neck looking back.